When confronted with pain, he
shuts down,
locked up,
a self-combusting island
finding freedom in movement, and
just enough breathing space in freedom
to let go and return with a
satisfying “I’m sorry.”
But I,
I want to speak,
to break through the silence with
words, reasons and explanations that
eventually give way to blame.
I want him to hurt too.
And so I cut him out of my heart,
like my sister
because he shares her carelessness,
or my father’s anger.
Gingerly discarded, he’s placed
where my heart cannot reach him,
next to failed expectations,
weepy talks with God and
elusive dreams.
Broken spectacles.
A child slapped.
Baby teeth that flew across the room
and landed
next to blue plastic ballet slippers.
The ones my father thought were ugly.
The ones my sister stole from me.
The ones that I hoped would make me famous.
Left untended,
ignored and soon forgotten
he becomes another
dirty, discolored memory.
Can you stop colors from fading, or
cotton from fraying?
What is understood in a moment
lives its course, with increasingly
difficult apologies and distant
“I love you’s” until one day,
like every other love undone, he will
disappear into a heavy iron chest
of failed moments
and forgotten passions.
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3 comments:
He Umbreen,
This is a very beautiful piece, and I'm not just trying to be nice.:)
You should keep on posting more! :) And have you ever considered becoming a full time poet? :) You should! :)
beautiful piece umbreen....beautiful/!!! i was just wondering 'little ballerina' or 'colors that fade' goes with this ???
i read your poem yesterday and thrice i typed my comments in here but decided not to submit them.bad as i am at expressing myself,i felt that my comments just did not do justice to what i felt when i read your poem.i read it twice...very slowly,going over each line many times.. n signed out of blogger.i walked away knowing that u would never get the telepathic message that i sent you after readin it,yet i thought that would suffice.and last night when i myself was having 'weepy talks with God',your poem kept coming back to me.i was surprised at myself when i realised i remembered by heart quite a few parts of your poem.i'm falling horribly short of words here...so all that i'm going to say is that it's very touching...and something everyone can so relate to when confronted with pain.something that kept runnin like a film at the back of my mind all through last night ...into the wee hours of the mornin...
ermm...i guess that's going to be all.i wanted to say much more but...i don't know how to.just hope you have SOME idea of how beautiful i found your piece of work.
:)
*teddy hug* :) :)
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